How To Build A Estate Plan That TRULY Reflects Your Values | Repair The Roof Podcast

Subscribe where ever you listen to Podcasts:

Spotify Podcasts
Apple Podcasts
Google Podcasts

Resources:

Ted Gudorf, a certified estate planning attorney, discusses the critical aspects of legacy planning. He emphasizes the importance of not just legal documents but also the values and wisdom that should be passed down to future generations. Gudorf outlines practical steps for creating a values-based legacy, including writing a legacy letter, preserving digital assets, choosing the right executors, and maintaining open communication with family members. He also highlights the significance of preparing heirs for the responsibilities of wealth and the role of charitable giving in reinforcing family values.

The Hidden Power of a Values-Based Estate Plan: Protecting Your Family, Your Legacy, and What You Stand For

Picture this: you leave your daughter a $500,000 inheritance, and two years later, half of it ends up with her ex-husband after a divorce. Or your son inherits the family business, gets sued after a car accident, and loses it all to pay the judgment.

These aren’t rare tragedies—they happen to families every single day.

Most people believe that drafting a will or setting up a trust is enough to protect their loved ones. But here’s the truth: legal documents alone don’t protect values—they only transfer assets.

I’m Ted Gudorf, a board-certified estate planning attorney. After helping hundreds of families preserve their legacies, I’ve learned that true legacy planning goes far beyond paperwork. It’s about aligning your wealth with your principles so your family inherits more than money—they inherit meaning.

The #1 Mistake in Legacy Planning

Most people focus entirely on the what—what assets go to whom. But they neglect the why.

A will or trust can distribute your property, but it can’t explain your intentions. It can’t convey your beliefs, lessons, or the wisdom that shaped your success. And without that context, wealth often becomes a wedge instead of a gift.

In fact, studies show that 70% of families lose their wealth by the second generation, and 90% by the third—not because of taxes or bad investments, but because values weren’t passed along with the money.

So, how do you build an estate plan that actually carries your values forward?

Here’s the framework I use with clients who want to create legacies that last.

Step 1: Write a Legacy Letter

Forget legal jargon. This isn’t a document for the courthouse—it’s a letter from your heart.

A Legacy Letter is your chance to share the story behind your success, the values that guided your life, and your hopes for your family’s future.

It answers the questions your heirs will someday wish they could ask you:

  • Why did you make certain financial decisions?

  • What mattered most to you in life?

  • What do you want your children and grandchildren to carry forward?

Maybe you left more to one child because of special needs, or you set up educational trusts because you believe in lifelong learning. Explaining why ensures your choices are seen as love, not favoritism.

And while money will one day be spent, your words will endure forever.

Step 2: Preserve Your Digital Life

Today, much of our legacy lives online. Family photos, home videos, meaningful emails—all stored in the cloud.

Without a plan, these digital treasures can vanish.
Start by creating a digital inventory:

  • Social media and photo accounts

  • Email and subscriptions

  • Online banking or investment platforms

  • Digital purchases or cryptocurrency

Store this information securely in a password manager or encrypted file, and make sure trusted family members know how to access it.

Think of it as preserving not just your estate, but your story.

Step 3: Choose the Right People—Not Just the Right Papers

Your executor, trustee, and power of attorney aren’t mere names on forms. They’re the guardians of your intent.

Choose individuals who understand and share your values. Then, talk to them. Explain not only what you want done, but why it matters.

This conversation is the bridge between legal documents and living values. Without it, even the best plan can fail through misunderstanding.

Step 4: Organize Your Documents (and Your Intent)

Even the most well-drafted trust is useless if your family can’t find it—or worse, if your assets aren’t aligned with it.

Gather your key documents:

  • Wills and trusts

  • Deeds and titles

  • Insurance and investment accounts

  • Business ownership records

Keep everything in one secure, accessible location—preferably a client portal or protected binder.

Then, create an asset inventory that doesn’t just list what you own, but explains how each item fits into your legacy. For example:

“The business passes to my eldest because they’ve led it for a decade. My goal is continuity, not favoritism.”

This clarity prevents confusion and honors your intent long after you’re gone.

Step 5: Align Your Assets with Your Plan

This step, known as asset alignment or funding, is where most estate plans fail.

If you’ve created a trust but never transferred your assets into it, your family could still face probate—a costly, time-consuming court process you were trying to avoid.

Every account, property, and business interest must be properly titled to ensure they flow through the trust as designed.

Remember: your documents only work if your assets are aligned.

Step 6: Protect Your Heirs from Threats (and Themselves)

Even the most well-meaning inheritance can cause harm if left unprotected. Divorce, lawsuits, creditors—even poor spending habits—can erode wealth quickly.

The solution? Continuing trusts.

These trusts allow access to funds for legitimate needs—like education, healthcare, or home purchases—while keeping assets shielded from external risks.

You can also build in incentives that reflect your values:

  • Funds for education or charitable giving

  • Matching earned income

  • Encouragement for community service

Your plan becomes more than protection—it becomes a guide for wise stewardship.

Step 7: Communicate While You’re Alive

Estate planning shouldn’t be a secret.

At Gudorf Law Group, we encourage families to host family meetings where we walk through the estate plan at a high level.

These meetings don’t get bogged down in legal details. Instead, they ensure everyone understands the big picture—what’s been set up, why it matters, and who’s responsible for carrying it out.

Families who take this step report less conflict, fewer surprises, and stronger relationships after a loved one’s passing.

Remember: confusion causes conflict. Communication prevents it.

Step 8: Prepare Your Beneficiaries for Wealth

Sudden wealth can overwhelm even the most responsible heirs. Without preparation, it can lead to poor decisions or even financial ruin.

Consider adding provisions for:

  • Financial literacy training

  • Mentorship or education milestones

  • Charitable matching programs

These strategies ensure your heirs are ready to manage wealth with the same discipline and purpose you built it with.

Step 9: Use Technology to Preserve Your Wisdom

Money fades. Memories don’t have to.

Record short video messages for major milestones—graduations, weddings, new grandchildren, birthdays. Your voice and presence can inspire in ways documents never could.

You might also digitize family stories, traditions, or recipes that tell the story of who you are and where you came from.

Your heirs will remember your values not as words on paper, but as living lessons.

Step 10: Extend Your Legacy Through Giving

For many families, legacy means more than inheritance—it means impact.

Integrate charitable giving into your estate plan through:

  • Foundations or donor-advised funds

  • Charitable remainder trusts

  • Simple bequests to causes you care about

When your family sees you prioritize giving, it reinforces the belief that wealth carries responsibility.

The Heart of Legacy Planning

Legacy planning isn’t about control—it’s about empowerment.

When you combine solid legal structures with clear communication of your values, you do more than pass on assets. You pass on the story of your life, your wisdom, and your purpose.

That’s how you build an estate plan that truly reflects who you are—and ensures that your family carries not just your wealth, but your values, forward for generations.

Transcript: Prefer to Read — Click to Open

Ted Gudorf (00:15.224)

Picture this, you leave your daughter a $500,000 inheritance and two years later half of it ends up with her ex-husband in a divorce. Or imagine your son inherits the family business, gets sued after a car accident, and loses it all to pay the judgment. These aren’t rare tragedies, they happen to families every single day.

In this video, I’ll reveal the single most powerful strategy to protect your children’s inheritance from divorce, lawsuits, or creditors, including bankruptcies. We are going beyond ordinary wills and trusts to explore real solutions that actually work. I’m Ted Gudorf, a certified estate planning attorney who has helped hundreds of families preserve lasting legacies. And what I’m about to share goes far beyond

the traditional legal approach. Here’s a mistake most people make with legacy planning. They put all their focus on the legal documents, the wills, the trust, the powers of attorney, believing that’s enough to secure their family’s future. But here’s the reality. Documents only transfer assets. They don’t pass on your wisdom, your values, or the lessons that shaped your success. That’s why so many families lose their wealth within a generation.

The heirs inherit money, but not the mindset that built it. So, the first step in creating a values-based legacy is writing what I call a legacy letter. This isn’t a legal form that requires witnesses or court filing. No, it’s a personal letter from you to those you love most. Think of it as your chance to share the story behind your success.

the values that guided your choices and your hopes for how your family will use the inheritance you leave behind. In it, explain not just what you’re giving them, but why you made those decisions. Maybe one child receives more because of special needs, or you set up educational trusts because you believe in learning. Long after the legal papers are tucked away, your family will cherish this letter forever.

Ted Gudorf (02:45.634)

But the legacy letter is only the beginning. The second critical step is preserving your digital life. Today, our most treasured memories live on phones, computers, and cloud storage. Family photos, childhood videos, meaningful messages. These digital assets could vanish if you don’t plan for them. Start by creating an inventory of all of your online accounts

and digital property, social media, photo storage, email, subscriptions, and digital purchases. Then leave clear instructions for access. Store this list securely in a password manager or encrypted file, but make sure trusted family members know how to retrieve it. The third step is choosing the right people to carry out your estate plan and having honest conversations with them.

Your executor, power of attorney, health care agent, aren’t just names on forms. They’re the ones who will carry out your wishes and represent your values. Select individuals who are not only reliable, but who understand what truly matters to you. Then sit down with them, explain your plan, and provide context for your choices. This ensures your wishes are carried out in alignment with your values. Now,

Let’s discuss organizing your documents and assets in a way that reflects your intent. Even the best estate plan fails if your family can’t find what matters. Collect your key documents, trust, wills, deeds, insurance policies, financial statements, and keep them together in one secure accessible location, perhaps a client portal. Create an inventory that shows not just what you own,

but how each item fits into your bigger legacy. For example, if you’re leaving the family business, include notes on why you believe your children are ready and the values you hope they bring to running it. Now here’s something most estate attorneys won’t tell you. The way your assets are titled matters as much as the documents themselves. This is called asset alignment or funding.

Ted Gudorf (05:12.799)

and it’s what makes an estate plan actually work. If you’ve drafted a trust but never transferred assets into it, your family could still be dragged through costly probate. Every account, property, and business interest must be properly titled. This isn’t just about efficiency. It ensures assets flow through the protective structures you’ve set up for your beneficiaries.

Let me give you a real example. A client of mine built a manufacturing company over 30 years. He could have divided it equally among his three kids, but that wouldn’t reflect his values. He believed in rewarding commitment. So he structured things so that the child who worked in the business for over a decade received a controlling interest, while the other two received equal value through different assets and income streams. In his legacy letter,

He explained this wasn’t favoritism. It was about ensuring the business thrived under leadership that understood its culture and values.

Ted Gudorf (06:42.539)

Another key to protecting your heirs is shielding them from both external threats and their own mistakes. Continuing trusts are a powerful solution. Instead of leaving assets outright, you can keep inheritances inside protective trusts. Now, these trusts give beneficiaries access to funds for education, health care, or other needs while shielding assets from bad things like divorce, lawsuits.

creditors, bankruptcies, perhaps poor spending habits. You can even build in incentives that encourage values like education or charitable giving. Communication is another critical element. Legacy planning isn’t a one-time event. It’s an ongoing dialogue. Host regular family meetings to discuss not just documents, but the principles and values guiding your plan.

share stories about how you built your wealth, mistakes you made, and lessons you learned. These conversations help the next generation embrace your values, not just inherit your money. At Gudorf Law Group, as part of our Family, Estate, and Legacy program, we provide all of our clients something we found to be incredibly valuable, a dedicated family meeting. This is an opportunity for you, your loved ones, and our team

to come together and walk through your estate plan at a high level. The purpose isn’t to overwhelm your children with legal details, but rather to make sure everyone understands the big picture of what you set up and why. It’s always your decision how much or how little to share with your kids. But what we found is that communication almost always leads to better outcomes. When these conversations happen during life, it eliminates confusion later.

Your children aren’t left guessing about your intentions, and they’re far less likely to be surprised or conflicted when the plan is carried out. In fact, the lack of clarity after death is often what causes the most pain, not the legal process itself. Siblings may interpret your choices differently or fail to understand your reasoning, which can lead to conflict and even litigation.

Ted Gudorf (09:10.829)

A structured family meeting prevents that by letting you explain your wishes directly in your own words. We’ll also highlight the roles of decision makers, your executor, trustee, or health care agent, so your family knows exactly who is responsible for what. Families who participate in these meetings consistently tell us it gives them peace of mind, strengthens relationships,

and ensures that your legacy is understood, honored, and preserved. Time and again, our experience has shown that more communication, both while you’re here and after you’re gone, protects not only wealth but family harmony. A commonly overlooked piece of legacy planning is preparing beneficiaries for the responsibility of receiving wealth. Sudden inheritance

can overwhelm and even harm those unprepared. You can include educational requirements, mentorship, or financial literacy training as a part of your plan. Some families match to earn income, others reward charitable giving. Done right, these provisions empower your heirs to make wise choices aligned with your values.

Ted Gudorf (10:59.521)

Technology can also be used to preserve your wisdom. Consider recording video messages to be shared at key milestones, graduations, weddings, the birth of grandchildren, or certain birthdays. Your voice and presence can pass on encouragement and lessons in ways documents never could. You might also preserve family history, traditions,

and stories that could otherwise fade with time. Finally, remember that a values-based legacy often extends beyond your family. Many families incorporate charitable giving into their estate plan, reinforcing their values while benefiting the community. This may involve a foundation, a charitable remainder trust, a charitable lead trust, or simply leaving gifts to causes you care about.

When your family sees you prioritize giving, it instills the importance of using wealth responsibly. At its heart, legacy planning isn’t about controlling your family from the grave. It’s about equipping them with the tools, wisdom, and resources to succeed while honoring your values. A strong plan empowers your heirs rather than restricting them, creating a framework that sustains both wealth and principles.

True legacy planning means documenting not only what you leave, but why. When you combine legal planning with clear communication of your values, you create more than a transfer of wealth. You create a lasting legacy that benefits generations. Now that you know how to build a values-based legacy, make sure you’re not making costly mistakes that could ruin everything you work for. Click here.

to watch my video on the most common estate planning errors that can destroy your legacy. And I’ll show you how to avoid each and every one of

Back to All Episodes